i have been pretty frustrated lately. there's just some stuff i have been thinking through. i think i have said this before, but i'm a big talker with no action. so i want to make this clear, this isnt a judgement on anyone, just feelings and thoughts. i dont think they amount to much, i dont have a life to back what i'm saying.
i think alot of people are frustrated with the church, but i got to be honest with you, i'm frustrated with myself. i was so blinded to what was going on. Dependent and relying other people to make my choices and beliefs. I agreed with the war, because the people around me agreed with it. they seem to know what they were talking about. but now i'm not too sure about what they are saying. but then i dont know about what the peace activist are saying. i mean there's got to be healthy way of doing things. of fighting and loving. i feel very soon a patting on my head is in order, "there, there."
i'm frustrated that i dont have courage to live by my convictions. no matter what it means. in my eyes, pain is the signal to give up. adversity is the time to find a corner. perserverance is when it becomes too much. oh please, i'm not asking for pity or anything else. i'm just saying stuff. i'm just saying that i got nothing to say about your life, but that i need to change mine. thats all.